Don’t suggest she’s an alcoholic if she has a second glass of wine, especially as you are in the process of downing a double martini.
Don’t tell her how upright and kind you are then lie, snip sarcastically at people and put them down for no apparent reason except to build up your own ego.
Don’t eat just before going out to dinner so that you’ll order less food, particularly if money is not a problem for you.
Don’t look over into her empty plate after finishing dinner and exclaim excitedly about her healthy appetite.
Don’t stare at your plate the entire time you are eating dinner. Try to look her in the eye and converse. It is part of the romantic experience.
Don’t tell her your ex-wife cheated on you and that you were loyal and devoted throughout your thirty-year marriage. This story is a cliche but, if in the off-chance it happens to be true, wait a while before you spring it on your new love. She has to trust you before she’ll believe it.
Don’t tell her you were a good husband and father and yet, have no idea why your wife walked out on you. Think about your participation, and be honest.
Don’t pretend emotions are only for women. Everyone has them. If you’ve managed to suppress yours, you will find your relationship stuck in a boring groove.
Don’t demean the women’s movement because it makes you feel manly. All it does is show your insecurities.
Don’t put down good dramas that develop characters and evolving relationships. It is an area where we all can learn. If you deny the seriousness of it because you consider it “girl” stuff and refuse to listen, you will be on the wrong side of enlightenment.
Don’t give your ex-wife names or addresses of the women you’re dating (or even a hint) if you owe the ex money.
Don’t invite a woman for a romantic liaison and then ask her to pay the hotel bill – especially if you’re married. And remember to say you’re married upfront!
Don’t ask her what size dress she wears and then tell her your ex-wife wore a size four. She is, after all, your ex-wife.
Don’t talk about yourself for three hours and then encourage the woman you’re with to speak about herself if you are in the habit of interrupting after the second sentence.
Don’t tell me you divorced your wife because she strove desperately to be as smart as you (and, of course, didn’t succeed).
Don’t try to convert me if I say I’m not the least bit religious or belong to any organized religion. And especially don’t lecture me about the subject.
Don’t answer my questions with a long-winded lecture, especially if it is totally unrelated to the subject.
Don’t give a rundown of all your activities for the week and then pencil a woman in on the most undesirable day and time, especially after dating for several months. It’s obvious you want to keep the woman in her place, keep her guessing. It’s just another bad example of game-playing.
Don’t be afraid to be the real you, warts and all. It’s a turn on to many women.
Don’t call and say, “What night this week do we have a date? I forgot.”
Don’t say you can’t get involved in a relationship until your old mother dies (she might live to 110).
Don’t look away when a woman speaks to you.
Don’t play loud music or turn on the TV when she says we have to talk.
The next blog will detail the positives, the actions that make for great, fun relationships.
The sexy grandmom